Should the news break that someone you know has died, you will likely reach for your phone first to check their social media profile for more information. This is the age we live in. Grief is no longer a personal and isolated experience in this technological era. By the time you hear about a death, others will likely have heard about it too.

And should you confirm the shocking news on social media, you’ll probably wonder what you should post on their profile.

Consider the following before posting anything to any social media platform.

Respect Privacy, First and Foremost

You may confirm the news of a friend’s death via another source. Do not break the news on social media; generally, it’s a good idea to wait until a family member of the deceased has shared the news before posting about the death yourself.

Remember, the family is dealing with an overload of information and emotions. They certainly don’t need someone jumping the gun on social media. If you post something on social media before the family does, it will add to their stress. People will start calling and texting them directly at a time when they really need a moment to themselves.

Sharing the news prematurely may also create a chain reaction, and it may reach those who have yet to be personally informed.

Keep Your Message Simple

If the family confirmed the news on social media, you could post a message of condolences. Keep it simple, even if you were close to the deceased; something like ‘Rest in peace, dear friend’ is enough to convey your feelings.

Never express curiosity on social media about how someone died. Again, even if you knew the person well, social media is not the place to ask those questions. Instead, gently remind the family that you’re there to help and support them should they need anything.

Post Only Relevant, Helpful Information

If the family asks you to share a death announcement or funeral details, post only relevant information. Link the announcement to an official obituary or online tribute. Remember to provide funeral details well in advance to allow people to plan and prepare for the day.

If you are part of the immediate family, you could offer to create a memorial page where everyone can pay their respects. Leave the first message and encourage others to follow.

Share Poetry or Moving Quotes

If words fail you, turn to poetry or quotes to pay tribute to the deceased. You can share a poem the deceased loved or a quote that reminds you of them.

When you do this, keep in mind the platform you’re using. Long poems and extracts from beloved books work well on Facebook. The same tributes may not work on Twitter because of the character limit. However, you could use Instagram for a video tribute featuring your favorite photos and video clips.

Take a Break From Social Media If You Need To

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, take a break when your grief becomes overwhelming. Dealing with a loved one’s death is hard. You don’t have to pretend you’re coping on social media. If posting about the situation and seeing others’ posts becomes too much, take a step back.

The Bottom Line

The death of a beloved family member or friend is profoundly personal. How you choose to express your grief is entirely up to you. However, it’s always wise to post only relevant information about details like funeral services and to respect the privacy of the family of the deceased.

For more information on how to respectfully post information on social media after someone dies, contact Wyuka Cemetery at (402) 474-3600.